Articles, Blog

Every Romantic Movie

Hey guys! So I know I never say this ’cause I don’t like to brag or anything, but I’m the probably the most romantic person I have met in the entire world ever! If anything I always say in my videos that I’m actually the opposite, that I’m not romantic but I really am I-I’m a womanizer! Which means I’m a.. I’m a Britney Spears song.. apparently That’s crazy Oops Did it again As I was saying… I’m a very romantic person. I literally do all the things that girls want For example: I open doors, Oh, you want me to drive? Course not, I’m a gentleman, just… get in. Oh… okay. I bring her flowers Hey ! I got you something.. Oh ! Um.. another cartoon flower. But I remembered this time I remembered…I got you real ones as well! Oh you did?! Yeah! Here you go… Oh… See? How they’re like realistic. I pull out her chair. Oh thank you. Have a seat! And I know nobody even does this anymore but I’m such an old school romantic that I even take her jacket. Ooh! Oh! That is cold, here uh let me get this. Oh actually I’m kind of- that’s okay. It’s okay. Ahh…okay that’s way better. Should I get your jacket since you took mine? Nah, I’m good! Come on, let’s go! You see?! Shivering is not dead. Or something like that… Anyway! If it isn’t already incredibly obvious that I’m clearly joking..I’m horrible when it comes to romance. And I honestly believe it’s because of romantic movies. They set the bar too high for the rest of us! Hollywood does the same thing every year. They take this best-selling romantic novel, turn it into a movie, all of the girls in real life go and see this movie. Fall in love with the main guy, who’s impossibly perfect, and makes it impossible for the rest of us to compete. And when I thought about it, it actually gave me the idea that well- I should do that! So I did! Here’s a little trailer representing pretty much Every Romantic Movie ever made. Except the fact that it’s not based off of a novel. And of course, again it’s not a real movie, it’s just a trailer… And also the main guy is me, which is-well obviously that would never happen. Because, you know-look at my eyes… Hollywood would never cast anyone with eyes like this. ‘Cause you know, I have bad eyesight, and if you have eyes like this, you wouldn’t be able to read the script. And also, like I mean, let’s just be honest, Hollywood would cast somebody with my type of race, you know with my kind of genes. Because I mean if there was a running scene or something, I would never be able to- look at these things-these jeans are way too big to race in. And of course the most obvious reason that Hollywood would never cast someone like me is because-well…I’m white. With that being said, here’s pretty much every single romantic movie ever made. Take a look! When an obviously older than twenty year old high school boy moves to a new town… You’re going to love it here sweetie. (bell rings) Friendships will be made. Hey, what’s up bro. Hey, how’s it going. Hey, I’m Friend One. Friend Two. Friend three. ‘Sup. Ryan. Hey, do you guys know that girl that’s over there? Yeah. Hot Julie, the hottest girl in school. Tall, blonde beau- I was actually talking about that girl over there. Do you guys know who that is? Yeah you don’t want to mess with that one. What do you mean? She’s kind of weird man… She doesn’t talk to anyone, she just plays with coal all day. Until fate conveniently brought them together… Welcome to Chemistry 101, I am Mr. Fate. Today you’ll be pairing up for the rest of the semester. Ryan! Why don’t you hook up with Katie? W-what? Hook up with Katie to be your partner…really get to know each other so that you two can create some chemistry together. Um… Just don’t start frenching in my class okay you two? Uh… oh no I wasn’t planning… ‘Cause says here that you two also have French class together with Mr. Wingman? Oh. Right. But yeah, you two should probably fu- Deep secrets will be discovered. Hey! So um… I know you don’t talk that much but I was just wondering if maybe we should meet up after school to work on our magnet project…? My mother was a coal miner but she died in a coal mine after it caved in and now I’m emotionally distraught and the only thing that makes me happy is carving figurines out of coal because it reminds me of her. Okay. Uh… um, I wasn’t really asking you about that- I just saved you an hour of the movie. Two opposites will attract. So, since my magnet is positive, and yours is negative. We should be able to attract like- Like you! What? I like you. You like me. Like U. Oh! (laughs) You were talking about the magnet! Um sorry I just- Doors will open. This is where I make all my stuff. Wow, these are actually amazing. You can sell these. That’s not why I make them. With a cute montage to show how perfect they are together. With beautiful moving shots of inanimate objects. Corny lines for teenage girls to quote on Facebook. “Love, is like a fart. It’s warm, predictable, and sometimes it stinks. But it can also be the best fitting in the world.” That’s why I’m so happy I passed you that day. I know now. I fart you. And some insignificant fact that will probably make sense at the end of the movie. Hey, can I ask you something kind of random? Sure. Do you believe in miracles? No, I don’t think so. Why not? I guess I just never see one happen before. But just when everything seemed perfect… Ryan, I have to tell you something. ‘Sup. Why are you being all serious all of the sudden? I’m sick. Yeah, you’re the sickest! No, I mean I’m ill. Like I said, you’re the illest girl I know! No, you don’t understand. I’m terminal. You’re terminal. But we’re not even at an airport. Conflicts will start. Just talk to me! Just open the door! Leave me alone! All you care about is your stupid coal! Get out! GET OUT! Just open the door! I said go away and leave me alone! Stay the hell away from my daughter! Friendships will be tested. Yo, you need to stop hanging out with her man. People are start to talk about you guys. I don’t care man. You’re right, you don’t. The only thing you care about is her. Come on Friend One. FRIEND ONE! Lies will unfold. Wait, what do you mean I’m adopted? Rain. Will. Fall. From the people who brought you A Walk to Remember… The Notebook… And Paranormal Activity. RHPC Presents: You sculpted something. Yeah. It’s out of coal. But why a mirror? So that every time you look into it, you’d see that you, you are my miracle. The Mirror Coal. I fart you. I fart you too. And I’ll see you in another life. Wait, what? Directed by Michael Bay. TEEHEE So thank you guys so much for watching. If you want to see bloopers and behind the scenes, click the one on the left. If you want to see the previous video, click the one on the right. And thank you so much to Arden for being in this video, if you want to check out her channel, click the one on the bottom. With that being said, I’m going to bed. PEACE! That’s the wrong video I don’t know what video that its from I don’t know!


  1. K A T E Author

    I’ve watched this a few times before but I just realized that Arden is playing as a girl named Katie. My mom’s name’s Arden and my name is Kate but my nickname is also Katie.. Coincidence?

  2. QueenOfLaughter Author

    Wow… I’ve watched this before and I didn’t know before now that they were dating…

    I fart you, lmaaaaaoooo 😂😂😂

    Wow, mirror coal…. that was so good 😂 genuis!!

  3. The Boba Turtle Author

    Ok that ending my face seriously turned into a surprised pikachu face, like seriously not even joking. I wanna see this as a real movie tho… also I wanted to see the other sad ending

  4. Actually Author

    All these perfect cliches if they could put together in a proper order. It would be be a masterpiece. Who needs new crap that doesn't amount to shit

  5. ItsKefka Author

    I just realized that when this was released, this was the only video that Ryan made that actually has a kissing scene that has an actual kiss in it. All other ones with girls and it's "romantic", they hide their faces and lips. But not with this one.


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