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Hidden Meaning in LOGAN – Earthling Cinema

Greetings, and welcome to Earthling Cinema. I am your host, Garyx Wormuloid. This week’s artifact is Logan, starring jacked
human Hugh Jackman, a huge actor playing his most famous role for the final time until
Les Miserables 2: More Miserables ate s*** at the box office and he went back to Marvel
for two cameos a year for the rest of his life. The film takes place 12 years into Donald
Trump’s presidency, when mutated humans were dying out and everything was made of sand. Wolverine is old and can’t heal too good,
so he’s not allowed to use his cool nickname anymore. He’s such a dork that he’s still close with
one of his high school teachers, who has inexplicably outlived everyone even though he was crazy
old to begin with. Logan meets a nurse who wants him to take
a young girl named Laura to the Garden of Eden, which Bible enthusiasts know was located
in North Dakota. The nurse is killed by a robot arm guy, but
Logan, Xavier, and Laura decide not to get killed by him. Later, they find a video on the nurse’s Samsung
Galaxy Note — a video she apparently found time to get professionally edited while she
was on the run — that reveals Laura is a mutant created from Logan’s deoxyribonucleic
acid, also known as jizz. They go eat dinner at a random farmer’s house,
but then a Wolverine clone shows up and starts slashing up the place like it’s a Guns N Roses
concert. Logan manages to hold him off and escape with
Laura’s alive body and Xavier’s dead body. Speaking of which, Xavier dies, spoiler alert. Logan and Laura finally arrive at the Garden
of Eden, which isn’t a garden so much as a hut on a cliff. Also, it’s Adam and Eve, not Adam and a bunch
of child mutants! Nevertheless, they’re just about to head off
to Canada for poutine and crumpets when some scientists show up to do the whole “explain
your evil plan” routine. Logan tires of this trope, so he blows his
load before the other guy can finish. The Wolverine clone impales Logan with a big
stick sticking out of another stick, and then Laura counters with some clone repellent. Logan tries to pull a Rogue One and have every
character die, but Laura takes the opposite approach, heading north in search of
universal healthcare. Logan pits the titular hero against his most
powerful enemy yet: real life. Logan struggles with all
the issues an ordinary middle-aged Earthling male might face. He must care for a mentally debilitated father
figure who’s disappointed in him for X-Men Origins. He’s developed arthritis and doesn’t bounce
back the way he did in his 120s. And perhaps most typical of his mid-life crisis,
he wants to buy a watercar. Where some previous X-Men films explore the
social ostracization the mutants experienced as an allegory for gayness, the alienation
Logan and Xavier suffer here is due to the inevitable march of time, something felt by
beings of all 557 sexual orientations. They have lost their friends and loved ones,
and the world has moved on without them, much like I moved on without my first family. By showing our familiar superheroes suffering
the indignities of growing old, the film’s inescapable message is that all things must
come to an end, even when they’re dripping with 90s nostalgia. The film borrows themes of redemption and
rumination from Westerns, and it won’t give those themes back without a fight. The most prevalent reference is the movie
Shane, which tells the story of a dude who protects a bunch of other dudes from a bad
guy dude, then leaves because it’s more poetic that way. Logan’s journey of self-reflection is played
out through Laura and the clone. The clone shares only Logan’s violent qualities,
and none of his human traits like sarcasm and being a dick. Thus, when Logan fights him, he is in essence
battling the parts of himself he wants to leave behind like I left behind my second
family. Laura also shares Logan’s genetic material
— she is, in a sense, his daughter from another otter. As Laura was trained to be a killer, she initially
reacts to any conflict with force. But since she’s just a wee bitty baby, she
hasn’t gone far down the road Logan has travelled since the Grover Cleveland administration,
volume one. Thus, if Logan can divert her from the path
of violence, he can find redemption through her. In the end, the path to Logan’s salvation
— not to mention the studio’s bottom line — requires him to spill as much CGI blood
as possible. Just as Shane dons the mantle of violence
to protect the people he’s grown to appreciate, Logan takes the serum that turns him into
a violent creature to protect the children he finds only moderately annoying. When he dies, Laura eulogizes him using Shane’s
quote from the end of the film. Logan knows he can’t overcome his violent
ways. He has to die so that the kids don’t turn
out like him, one of the most beloved characters in comic book history. The cross, which became a symbol of sacrifice
after Jesus started wearing one as a necklace, is turned to an X. This serves to put a period on the run-on
sentence that is the X-Men franchise as its last hero is laid to rest. And since X marks the spot, it also suggests
that Logan has actually been a treasure chest all along. For Earthling Cinema, I’m Garyx Wormuloid. Please “X-it” through the gift shop.


  1. Jack Williams Author

    Is the assumption that x-23 won't grow or have horrible deformities?
    Because they encased her skeleton in adamantium…her bones won't be able to grow.

  2. JackassBauer1 Author

    There is no hidden meaning in Logan, the meaning is pretty much in your face, the monomyth / american hero is obsolete, it is replaced by the new pagan belief system symbolized by the switch from the christian cross to the mutant X at the end by Laura

  3. Steven Sullivan Author

    this movie so bad and never in a million years should have gotten a hidden meaning. it was just god fucking awful. super fucking terrible. absolute shit. just sooooo bad

  4. MrAnderson Author

    And the movie was fucking awful, it was so fucking bad it was fucking garbage. And a last pathetic atempt at shameless self promovation by Marvel. I knew it would be a complete piece of trash from the trailer, even before I saw the movie, and Chuck I hate to be right.

  5. Bryn Whitehead Author

    This thing where you involved my family; it was written. Last year. The turning and being kept at bay. What happens next… It is what it is.

  6. Elmithian Author

    A bit too on-the-nose political. Then I mean that in previous videos they showed a lot of misunderstandings regarding the earthlings history and didn't really drop specific named political figures or healthcare stuff.

    Not disliking, just felt there was a tad too much focus on that then has been normal in these videos.

    I just felt this after having marathoned the other 3 seasons the past 2 days. Also some of the smart jabber and hints about the future the character is supposed to live in has been mostly replaced by this extra commentary so I do feel like there was a change/shift of writers somewhere in the third season to the early fourth season…

  7. Laciel Phantomhive Author

    Why do both clones have an adamantium skeleton. That's not natural when it came to logan. it came from the government program thing right?


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