Articles, Blog

Inside Amy Schumer – Acting Off-Camera


Hello? (woman on phone)
Hi, Amy, you’ve got
Dan, Allen, Isaac,
Matt, Allie, Jen,
and Russell.
(man on phone)
There she is!
There’s our girl.Ames,
what’s shaking?
What’d you get into
last night, girl?
Nothing much.
Just hanging out.(laughs hysterically)
You kill me!
You kill me!What’s up, guys? (man)
We know you’ve been looking
to make the transition
to doing more
off-camera work.
I never said that.They want you for the next
big animated kids’ movie.
It’s like “Charlie’s Angels,”
but with meerkats!
Jessica Alba and Megan Fox
have already signed
to play the other two.Uh, I’m in.
I’m– Yeah.Awesome, we’ll download you
on the deets
as soon as we circle back
with Tad, Allen out.
As soon as you do
what with who?Hanging up.
Hello? (phone beeps) Bing. (man)
Welcome, Amy. Are you thirsty?
Are you hungry? Did you find
your snacks okay? No, I brought this tea. Okay, well, the snacks are
here for when you need them. Okay?
Snacks. Okay. Red leather, yellow leather. Hey, did Meg and Jess
already do their stuff? All right,
let’s just roll it. Page one, scene one. You’ll hear a beep,
you’ll say your lines. Okay, cool. (audio playing back) (beeping) ♪ I’m prettyandnice.
I’m sexy, but I love math.
Karate! (loud thud)
(beeping) (man)
Okay, that was your cue. Uh, we’ll take it again. Just, when you hear
the beep, say the lines. That one’s me?
(flatulence) Yep, that’s you. Um, why doesn’t my meerkat
have any pants? Our animation team
is out of Japan, and they don’t have anybody as big as Dumpy the Frumpy
Meerkat over there, so they literally
couldn’t figure out how to make pants
to fit on you. They couldn’t even,
you know, fathom it. But it’s a cartoon. They can’t– why couldn’t
they just draw pants? It blew their minds. They had no idea.
They didn’t see the point. (long beep) Worms. Okay, we really need you
to drop it down a bunch. Like a whole bunch. It’s gotta be more like…
(deep voice) “Worms!” You know, like you
really love worms and you’re disgusting. Tell you what,
why don’t we just have you do some wild feeding noises? Can you find your snacks? (munching and mumbling) Okay, just give me one where
you eat for a little bit and then you stop to (bleep) and then go back
to eating again. Paging Ms. Streep! I mean, you are a star.
You’re killing this. She is
killing this, right? No, no, no, I think we need
to get me out of this. Schumes, what are we
talking about here, okay? You are crushing this. My character
has a pussy. Have you eaten
any snacks? Yes, I have my snacks. I’m sensing you’re
not totally jazzed, but I think I have
something that’s gonna
change your tune. Amy, meet… your action figure. (motor squeaking) It’s (bleep). Yeah, the thing
retails for $42.99. You get 60% of
the back end. Worms! (gobbling)
(flatulence)

100 Comments

  1. Jeremy Stone Author

    I seriously kept having severe laughing episodes after watching this one.  Crying, couldn't breathe, oh my.  "It's shitting".  Hahaha

    Reply
  2. LaDracul Author

    Well that totally hit the nail on the head about how I feel as an actress who isn't a ten…

    Though if that happened to me, I wouldn't sell out my principles…

    Reply
  3. James Dooling Author

    I have a dollar that says that was a real Amy Schumer fart at the end. This is her brilliance; love her or hate her, you're driving up a view count and she's cashing in either way.

    Reply
  4. steven smith Author

    If someone told me they were going to pay me a million dollars for putting on blackface and a porter's uniform and sing some really racist song and dance. I would walk on set wearing blackface and a porters uniform and say HELLO THERE MR DIRECTOR!!!! Might you be so kind as to tell me where you'd like me to stand sir. I would have to hide for a year or two but for that much it would be worth it.

    Reply
  5. lalala4va Author

    can i say True Story… sounds so sad… i pretty sure some one had to do something like this.
    this is the Hilariously exaggerated version.
    Gambate Amy <3

    Reply
  6. iivanov86 Author

    Everyone is LOL-ing hard (me included) but no one is commenting on the hidden message in this skit which is quite powerful. Unfortunately – we live in a social media "infected" society where no matter how disgusting something is if it brings us money we'll endorse it.

    Reply
  7. Arceus Lord of Creation Author

    "our animation team is out of Japan, and they don't have anyone as big as Dumpy the Frumpy Meerkat"

    ever hear of Sumo?

    Reply

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